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Die of Shame
Mark Billingham
Progress: 92/482 pages
New Teen Titans Vol. 8
Marv Wolfman, George Pérez
Nightmares & Dreamscapes
Stephen King
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"“Val, I have just secured for myself the only good-looking unattached straight man in this town. If you try to take him away from me, I will staple your ears to your shoulders.”"

Cobalt, by Nathan Aldyne (copyright 1982; quote is from page 96 of the Felony & Mayhem Press trade paperback edition, 2013).